Bacon Quotes, Captions

These bacon quotes are sure to put a smile on the face of bacon lovers everywhere.

Express your passion for bacon to the world with your favorite quote. And be sure to check out the funny bacon captions below. Enjoy!

Best bacon quotes and captions

Take a bite of these tasty quotes, sayings, and captions… about everything bacon!

1. Funny bacon quotes

I’d be vegetarian if bacon grew on trees
Matt Groening

If women are breadwinners and men bring home the bacon, why do people complain about having no dough? I’m confused. Also hungry.
Stephen Colbert

Donna was an enigma wrapped in bacon wrapped in a crescent roll.
Tina Fey

When you have bacon and eggs for breakfast, the chicken makes a contribution, the pig makes a commitment.
Fred Shero

First there was tainted lettuce. Now, tainted tomatoes. Who would have thought that the healthiest part of a B.L.T. would be the bacon?
David Letterman

You know you poor when you eatin’ breakfast food late. You fryin’ toast? At nine o’clock at night? With bacon? You’re broke.
Bernie Mac

When you have bacon in your mouth, it doesn’t matter who’s President or anything.
Louis CK

I used to have trouble choking down the pills I have to take for controlling my cholesterol, but it’s a lot easier now that I wrap them in bacon.
Brad Simanek

Bacon is so good by itself that to put it in any other food is an admission of failure. You’re basically saying, ‘I can’t make this other food taste good, so I’ll throw in bacon.’
Penn Jillett

Cute bacon sayings – Good for a laugh!

If there’s no bacon in heaven, I don’t plan on going.
Morgan Murphy

Life is too short not to order the bacon dessert.
George Takei

Look a pig in its eyes, and understand the truth behind bacon.
Mango Wodzak

Bacon. Admit it—for a second there, all your problems went away.
Unknown

Consider the silent repose of the sausage as compared to the aggressiveness of bacon.
Tom Robbins

Which does a man prefer? Bacon and eggs, or worship? Sometimes one, sometimes the other, depending how hungry he is.
Margaret Atwood

Listen to this, okay? Just listen. Do you hear that? That’s market bacon hitting the pan. Today a child is born unto us, and his name will be bacon.
Bryan Lee O’Malley

I used to think too much bacon was bad for me, so I stopped thinking!
Unknown

Either you like bacon, or you’re wrong.
Unknown

Slicing a warm slab of bacon is a lot like giving a ferret a shave. No matter how careful you are, somebody’s going to get hurt.
Alton Brown

If the waitress comes, order me a coffee and something that involves bacon.
Maggie Stiefvater

bacon quotes and captions image

2. Short bacon quotes

Who cannot appreciate the smell of bacon?
Tony Cardenas

When it comes to bacon, the answer is always yes.
Jennifer L. Armentrout

Bacon is meat candy.
Adam McArthur

Everything’s better with bacon and red wine!
Dianne Harman

You proposed over a plate of burned bacon?
Shelly Crane

I love bacon so much.
Ayesha Curry

Bacon improved things dramatically.
Kristin Cashore

Books are like bacon for the mind.
Thomas F. Shubnell

But whoever heard of enchanted bacon anyway?
Diana Wynne Jones

Showers are good. Perhaps not as good as bacon, but good.
Rick Riordan

My hair is ruined! I look like a pan of bacon and eggs!
Diana Wynne Jones

3. Bacon love quotes

She reached for another piece of bacon, then handed it to me. True love.
Sylvia Day

Bacon, bacon, oh, I love me some bacon! It’s the secret ingredient to all my favorite recipes. I also could have it for breakfast, lunch, and dinner!
Rachel Hollis

The more a man gazes on what he loves, the more he sets fire to his heart and bastes it with bacon fat.
Guillaume de Lorris

I need you like bacon needs eggs.
White Denim, ‘Ha Ha Ha Ha (Yeah)’

She kissed me, and I decided that I was glad too. A kiss in the sunset and the promise of a good bacon cheeseburger – with that kind of payoff, who needs immortality?
Rick Riordan

The universal food of the people of Texas, both rich and poor, seems to be corn-dodger and fried bacon.
Frederick Law Olmstead

Want to be the most popular person at a party? Bring a bacon appetizer. It’s a scientifically proven fact that bacon snacks get eaten first. Hummus doesn’t stand a chance.
Eliza Cross

I am yours until you ban bacon, or otherwise as long as I can put up with you.
Chloe Neill

Bacon lover sayings

My favorite meal would have to be good old-fashioned eggs, over easy, with bacon.
Gary Oldman

I think we love bacon because it has all the qualities of an amazing sensory experience. When we cook it, the sizzling sound is so appetizing, the aroma is maddening, the crunch of the texture is so gratifying and the taste delivers every time.
Alexandra Guarnaschelli

Bacon. Let’s talk about bacon. There’s no meat more glorious than bacon. You can add it to pasta instead of cheese. You can stick it in a sandwich, er… instead of cheese.
Rob Manuel

Bacon is life quotes

It is a truth universally acknowledged that bacon can improve any situation.
Jen Rasmussen

Thinking about the bacon—the potential of bacon—gives me hope. Not all is lost if bacon isn’t.
Rick Yancey

It’s a proven fact that all plans involving bacon have a 90 percent better chance of working out.
Jeff Gunhus

For the rest of her life, hope was going to smell a little bit like bacon.
Debora Geary

As I’ve said many times, the only way to stay trim is to eat bacon.
Emily Giffin

Life expectancy would grow by leaps and bounds if green vegetables smelled as good as bacon.
Doug Larson

Most people just want to be left in peace to eat their bacon, not realizing that there is no peace behind bacon.
Mango Wodzak

4. Bacon time quotes

Funny bacon quote by Bryan Lee O'Malley

Almost anything can be improved with the addition of bacon.
Jasper Fforde

Nothing is quite as intoxicating as the smell of bacon frying in the morning, save perhaps the smell of coffee brewing.
James Beard

Butter, cream, and bacon. That’s such a great foundation right there.
Ree Drummond

Frying bacon sayings

If you record the sound of bacon in a frying pan and play it back, it sounds like the pops and cracks on an old 33 1/3 recording. Almost exactly like that. You could substitute it for that sound.
Tom Waits

Love is when you fry the other person’s bacon even if you’re a vegetarian.
Patricia Nell Warren

Onions and bacon cooking up just makes your kitchen smell so good. In fact, one day I’m going to come up with a room deodorizer that smells like bacon and onions. It’s a fabulous smell.
Paula Deen

It was lights out at 8 p.m. in our house and we were up at dawn to the smell of coffee, frying bacon and scrambled eggs.
Charles Bukowski

Breakfast

Breakfast is my specialty. I admit it’s the easiest meal to cook, but I make everything with a twist, like lemon ricotta pancakes or bacon that’s baked instead of fried.
Hugh Jackman

I like a good protein and fat breakfast, so avocado, bacon, eggs, and some veggies.
Daniel Ricciardo

I don’t really eat breakfast that often. Truth is, I’m a bacon guy. I like breakfast, but I don’t really eat food until afternoon, so by that time, that’s not really breakfast.
RJ Mitte

Bacon and eggs quotes

My life is a plate of perfectly edible but ordinary scrambled eggs. I want them savory, creamy, cheesy and maybe with bacon on the side.
Varsha Bajaj

Up every day at six, bacon and eggs to fix.
The Supremes, ‘Queen Of The House’

Which does a man prefer? Bacon and eggs, or worship? Sometimes one, sometimes the other, depending on how hungry he is.
Margaret Atwood

Crispy bacon strips

I love super crispy, almost burned, snapping-crispy bacon.
David Lynch

Pork bacon

I didn’t eat pork either. Except for bacon, of course. Everyone eats bacon.
Tarryn Fisher

I always use my ‘Holy Trinity’, which is salt, olive oil and bacon. My motto is, ‘bacon always makes it better.’ I try to use bacon and pork products whenever I can.
Anne Burrell

Fake bacon

Veggie bacon?! That sounds like a sign of the Apocalypse.
Turtle Dundee

Turkey Bacon… It just doesn’t quite carry the moment.
George Takei

Jasper Fforde bacon quote

5. Famous bacon sayings

Nothing helps scenery like bacon and eggs.
Mark Twain

I had rather be shut up in a very modest cottage with my books, my family and a few old friends, dining on simple bacon, and letting the world roll on as it liked, than to occupy the most splendid post, which any human power can give.
Thomas Jefferson

Better beans and bacon in peace than cakes and ale in fear.
Aesop

Jim Gaffigan funny bacon quotes

You wanna know how good bacon is? To improve other food, they wrap it in bacon.
Jim Gaffigan

Bacon bits are like the fairy dust of the food community.
Jim Gaffigan

Interesting Fact: Turkey bacon is the source of 70% of all the disappointment in our lives.
Jim Gaffigan

Bacon’s the best. Even the frying of bacon sounds like applause.
Jim Gaffigan

You can’t tell me some of the success of Kevin Bacon isn’t somehow tied to his name. After all, nobody wants to see a Kevin Tofu movie.
Jim Gaffigan

Nick Offerman bacon sayings

The world is split into two halves: the bacon, and the bacon eaters.
Nick Offerman

You know, it’s hard to beat bacon at any time of day. But I also am a big fan of corned beef hash.
Nick Offerman

I awaken. I consume oxygen, then bacon, eggs and black coffee, then my wife, then bacon.
Nick Offerman

There have been a few occurrences where people in restaurants have sent me a rasher of bacon, which I am not going to turn my nose up at. I never let them down.
Nick Offerman

Homer Simpson

As long as you’re in my house, you’ll do what I do and believe what I believe! So butter your bacon!
Homer Simpson

Special day! Oh, what have I forgotten now? Now, don’t panic. Is it Bacon Day? No, that’s crazy talk!
Homer Simpson

Homer: Are you saying you’re never going to eat any animal again? What about bacon?
Lisa: No.
Homer: Ham?
Lisa: No.
Homer: Pork chops?
Lisa: Dad, those all come from the same animal.
Homer: Heh heh heh. Ooh, yeah, right, Lisa. A wonderful, magical animal.
The Simpsons

Mmmm. Move over, eggs. Bacon just got a new best friend – fudge.
Homer Simpson

Pork chops and bacon, my two favorite animals.
Homer Simpson

Not again! First you took away my Philly Fudgesteak. And then my Bacon Balls. Then my Whatchamachicken. You monster!
Homer Simpson

I’ll have the smiley face breakfast special. Uhh, but could you add a bacon nose? Plus bacon hair, bacon mustache, five o’clock shadow made of bacon bits and a bacon body.
Homer Simpson

6. Famous bacon quotes from movies and TV

Hey, what’s shakin’, bacon?
Monsters, Inc.

Bacon tastes gooood. Pork chops taste gooood.
John Travolta (Vincent Vega), Pulp Fiction

Slap some bacon on a biscuit and let’s go! We’re burnin’ daylight!
John Wayne, The Cowboys

I like waking up to the smell of bacon. Sue me.
Steve Carell (Michael Scott), The Office

I’m never gonna get used to the 31st century. Caffeinated bacon? Baconated grapefruit? ADMIRAL Crunch?
Fry, Futurama

Bacon is good for me.
Bacon Boy (King Curtis), Wifeswap USA

Hermes: Ah, you’re cooking me back bacon. Thank you, woman.
LaBarbara: That’s not back bacon! That’s your back, bakin’!
Futurama

Good Morning sweety. Oh my God, is that bacon? I love you, I love you, I love you.
Grace, Will & Grace

If you call ham “Canadian bacon”, what do you call bacon?
Ashton Kutcher (Michael Kelso), That ‘70s Show

Yes, I’ll have a non-fat, decaf latte, please. Oh, what the h—? Look, make it a full-fat mocha with extra whipped cream. What the h—, put a slice of bacon on it!”
Kelsey Grammer (Dr. Frasier Crane), Frasier

Parks and Recreation

There has never been a sadness that can’t be cured by breakfast food.
Nick Offerman (Ron Swanson), Parks and Recreation

Just give me all the bacon and eggs you have. Wait… I worry what you heard was, ‘Give me a lot of bacon and eggs.’ What I said was, give me all the bacon and eggs you have. Do you understand?”
Nick Offerman (Ron Swanson), Parks and Recreation

Give me all the bacon and eggs you have.
Nick Offerman (Ron Swanson), Parks and Recreation

SpongeBob SquarePants

Just do what I do when I have problems: Eat more bacon.
Patrick Star, SpongeBob SquarePants

Made with 100% all-natural secret ingredients, secretly assembled with undersea cheese, bacon, lettuce, tomato, onions, all nestled together between two seaweed seed buns.
SpongeBob SquarePants

Patrick: Hey, SpongeBob! I got you an ice cream.
SpongeBob: Thank you, best friend, Patrick.
Patrick: It’s your favorite! Dill Pickle Swirl with mustard and extra bacon bits!
SpongeBob SquarePants

7. Famous bacon quotes from books and literature

I’m happier than a pig eating bacon!
Lemony Snicket

He did not go much further, but sat down on the cold floor and gave himself up to complete miserableness, for a long while. He thought of himself frying bacon and eggs in his own kitchen at home—for he could feel inside that it was high time for some meal or other; but that only made him miserabler.
J.R.R. Tolkien

We don’t want Zuckerman to think Wilbur is crunchy. He might start thinking about crisp, crunchy bacon and tasty ham. That would put ideas into his head. We must advertise Wilbur’s noble qualities, not his tastiness.
E.B. White, Charlotte’s Web

Now I know what a piece of bacon feels like when it is suddenly picked out of the pan on a fork and put back on the shelf!
J.R.R. Tolkien, The Hobbit

Bacon poem

The little pig began to pray
But Wolfie blew his house away.
He shouted, “Bacon, Pork, and Ham!
Oh what a lucky wolf I am!
And though he ate the pig quite fast,
He carefully kept the tail till last.
Roald Dahl, Revolting Rhymes

8. Bacon captions for Instagram

Include a funny caption in your next Instagram post about bacon!

  • Bacon: The reason I’m not a vegetarian.
  • Only bacon has the answer.
  • Bacon—it’s like a high-five in your mouth.
  • My bucket list: 1. Fill a bucket with bacon. 2. Eat bacon.
  • Bacon is the real thing.
  • Heal the world with bacon.
  • Bacon always makes it better.
  • I can’t believe it’s not bacon.
  • Bacon makes dreams come true.
  • All you need is bacon and a dream.
  • That’s what I do. I eat bacon and I know things.
  • Bacon is meat candy.
  • One bacon is better than two of something else.
  • Bacon is my weakness.
  • Bacon stands above the rest.
  • Whatever sizzles your bacon.
  • Bacon solves your problems.
  • You’re in good hands with bacon.
  • Bacon takes good care of you.
  • Make it a bacon day.
  • Got bacon?
  • I can’t make everyone happy. I’m not bacon.
  • Bacon is the best!
  • The future’s bright. The future’s bacon.
  • Bacon works like magic.
  • Start the day right with bacon.
  • I’d do anything for bacon.
  • The best thing on earth.

Bacon love captions

  • All you need is love and bacon.
  • I put bacon on my bacon.
  • Only bacon prevents a bad day.
  • The best bacon a man can get.
  • I love you more than bacon.
  • Don’t go bacon my heart. (I couldn’t if I fried.)
  • I’d be a vegetarian if bacon grew on trees.
  • Either you love bacon or you’re wrong.
  • Have you had your bacon today?
  • Bacon is crazy good.
  • I like the bacon in you.
  • Got my daily dose of bacon.
  • What would you do for bacon.
  • Just bacon.
  • I’d walk a mile for bacon.
  • Happiness is bacon-shaped.
  • The bacon effect.
  • I believe in bacon.
  • Nothing comes between me and my bacon.

Funny bacon captions

  • I can’t make everyone happy – I’m not bacon.
  • I just want abs… …olutely all the bacon.
  • “That’s too much bacon,” said no one ever.
  • I think, therefore bacon.
  • If life gives you lemons, throw them away and get some bacon.
  • Try bacon. It’s gluten-free!
  • My favorite food group is bacon.
  • I put bacon on my bacon.
  • Stop and smell the bacon.
  • Body by bacon.
  • Me and bacon. We’re in a very committed relationship.
  • You bacon me crazy!
  • Roses are red. Bacon is red. Poems are hard. Bacon.
  • Praise the lard.
  • My spirit animal is bacon.
  • Gettin’ piggy with it.
  • I wonder if bacon thinks about me too.

Cute bacon captions

  • Makin’ bacon.
  • Meat candy goodness.
  • This guy loves bacon.
  • Runs like there’s bacon at the finish line.
  • Salty, delicious, bacon-y goodness.
  • I’d wrap that in bacon.
  • Because bacon.
  • Keep calm and eat bacon.
  • Life is better with bacon.
  • Then God said… let there be bacon.
  • Give me fuel, give me fire, give me bacon I desire.
  • You had me at bacon.
  • This girl loves bacon.
  • Wake’n for bacon.
  • May I suggest bacon with that?
  • Fueled by bacon.
  • United States of bacon.
  • Bacon queen.

Thanks for reading these bacon quotes, sayings, and captions. Here are more quote lists you’ll enjoy:

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