Horse Jokes For Kids

Giddy-up, partner! Here’s a whole collection of horse jokes for kids — 99 of them. Your little ones will love learning about the various breeds and equestrian terms, while you’ll enjoy knowing they’re laughing away.

Prepare yourself for hours of laughter with this collection of horse jokes for kids.


    Best horse jokes

    There are lots of jokes available online, but if you’re looking for a collection of the best ones, you’ve come to the right place. These jokes are perfect for a quick party joke or just for a few laughs.

    1.) What’s the hardest thing about learning to ride a horse?
    The ground.

    2.) Which horse can jump higher than a house?
    All of them – houses can’t jump at all.

    3.) What is black and white and eats like a horse?
    A zebra.

    4.) Why was the racehorse nicknamed “News?”
    Everyone knows that news travels fast.

    5.) Did you hear about Cinderella’s horse?
    Once upony time…

    6.) How do you save a horse possessed by an evil spirit?
    Perform an ex-horse-ism.

    7.) How many horses does it take to build a barn?
    None, as they don’t have hands.

    8.) What did the horse say when it fell?
    “I’ve fallen and I can’t giddyup!”

    9.) What does every horse and rider do together?
    They age.

    10.) Why are most horses in shape?
    Because they are on a stable diet.

    11.) What do you call a horse that lives next door?
    Your neigh-bor.

    horse jokes for kids

    Good horse jokes for kids

    This section holds lots of jokes so kids can expand their sense of humor and creative thinking. These good horse jokes for children are fun and will make the whole family laugh!

    12.) How do you get a jockey to wait a moment?
    Tell him to hold his horses.

    13.) Did you hear about the horse with the negative altitude?
    She always said, “Neigh.”

    14.) Where do you find a horse with no legs?
    Where you left him.

    15.) What do you call a horse that’s been all around the world?
    A globe-trotter.

    16.) What looks like half a horse?
    The other half.

    17.) What do you call an insincere small horse?
    A phony pony.

    18.) What are a horse’s favorite sports?
    Stable tennis and barn ball.

    19.) What did the horse grow in her garden?
    Horse radishes.

    20.) Which state do horses live in?

    21.) What is a horse’s favorite state?

    Short horse jokes

    Horse jokes are better when they are short and sweet, so that’s where this convenient list of horse jokes comes in handy. It gives you a bunch of short horse jokes for kids that you can use at home with the family or on those long car journeys. They’re great to drop into your daily conversations too!

    22.) When do vampires like horse racing?
    When it’s neck and neck.

    23.) What kind of food do competitive horse races like to eat?
    Fast food.

    24.) How do you get a pony’s attention?
    Shout “Hey!”

    25.) Why was the horse really proud of his school test results?
    Because he got a Hay-plus!

    26.) What did the lunch lady say to the horses?
    Stop horsing around.

    27.) What do young horses wrap their food in?
    Aluminum foal.

    28.) I recently bought a horse and I decided to name him Mayo.
    Mayo neighs.

    29.) Where do the horses in the barn eat?
    At the stable table.

    30.) When does a horse talk?
    Whinny wants to!

    31.) What do you call a well-balanced horse?

    32.) Why did the pony yell?
    He wanted to be herd.

    33.) What do you call a scary horse in the dark?
    A night-mare!

    funny jokes for kids

    Top horse jokes for kids

    Know a child who loves horses? A child who needs a good laugh? Then this collection of top horse jokes for kids is perfect for them. The jokes within this collection are fun, light, and kid-friendly.

    34.) Why did the horse eat with its mouth open?
    Because it had bad stable manners!

    35.) What’s the difference between a Western horse and an Eastern horse?
    About 2,000 miles.

    36.) Where does a horse’s leg bend?
    At the po-knee!

    37.) How do they vote in the horse senate?
    With a yay or neigh.

    38.) What do you give a sick horse?
    A cough stirrup.

    39.) What is the best type of story to tell a runaway horse?
    A tale of WHOA!

    40.) Did you hear about the horse who had to go to court?
    At first, he was going to lie, but then the judge reminded him he was under oats.

    41.) What street did the horse live on?
    Mane Street.

    42.) Why do cowboys ride horses?
    Because horses are too heavy to carry!

    43.) What did the waiter say to the horse?
    I can’t take your order. That’s not my assigned stable.

    44.) What type of computer does a horse like to eat?
    Mac Apples.

    Funny horse jokes for kids

    Here’s a collection of horse jokes for kids. These funny horse jokes can be a great part of family activity for any gathering! These horse jokes for kids are fun and enjoyable for everyone.

    45.) How does a horse from Kentucky greet another horse?
    With horse-pitality!

    46.) Why wouldn’t the quarter horse cross the river after the family picnic?
    He knew you shouldn’t swim on a foal stomach.

    47.) Who rode a horse up the hill to fetch a pail of water?
    Jockey and Jill.

    48.) Why did the man stand behind the horse?
    He was hoping to get a kick out of it.

    49.) What did the judge say to the naughty pony?
    No more tricks or I’ll use prison stripes and you’ll look like any other zebra.

    50.) Who isn’t an upside-down horseshoe good luck for?
    The horse who lost it!

    51.) Who did the pony audition for in the school play?
    The mane part.

    52.) What do you call a horse with two legs?
    A horse without two legs.

    53.) What kind of bread does a horse eat?

    54.) What disease was the horse scared of getting?
    Hay fever.

    55.) A man asks his vet, “Will I be able to race my horse again?”
    The vet said, “Yes, of course, you will. But I think you’ll get beaten by him at any time!”

    funny horse joke

    Clean horse jokes for kids

    If you have kids and they have a sense of humor, these Clean Horse Jokes for Kids will make their day. They will laugh from the depth of their heart. Here they are:

    56.) Which side of the horse has the most hair?
    The outside.

    57.) What’s as big as a horse, but weighs nothing?
    The horse’s shadow.

    58.) Where do newly married horses sleep?
    In the bridle suite.

    59.) What kind of horse can swim underwater?
    A seahorse.

    60.) Son: Can I have a pony for Christmas?
    Mom: The oven’s only big enough for a turkey!

    61.) What is the difference between a horse and a duck?
    One goes “quack” and the other goes “quick”!

    62.) 100 years ago everyone owned a horse and only the rich had cars. Today everyone owns cars and only the rich own horses.
    The stables have turned.

    63.) What’s the difference between a horse and the weather?
    One reigns up and one rains down!

    64.) Did you hear about the pessimist pony?
    He was a neigh-sayer!

    65.) You’re riding a horse full speed, there’s a giraffe right beside you, and a lion behind you. What do you do?
    Get off the carousel once it stops.

    66.) What do you call a horse wearing Venetian blinds?
    A zebra.

    Silly horse jokes

    If you or your child love horses, then you’ll enjoy these horse jokes for kids. These silly horse jokes for kids are great to share. These are appropriate for any age, so you don’t need to be wary of sharing them with a broad audience.

    67.) Why did the skinny man start eating hay?
    The doctor told him to gain weight, he needed to eat like a horse!

    68.) How did the cowboy ride into town on Friday, stay for three days, and ride out on Friday?
    His horse’s name was Friday!

    69.) Did you hear about the man who was hospitalized because he swallowed six plastic horses?
    The doctor described his condition as stable.

    70.) What animal has four legs and walks backward?
    A horse in reverse.

    71.) Why did the cowboy feed his horse so much hay?
    He thought it would make it softer to ride on.

    72.) How can you tell the difference between a horse and a pig?
    The horse is the one that doesn’t look like a pig.

    73.) What happens when a horse forgets its umbrella?
    It gets wet.

    74.) You’ll never find a horse using an Android phone.
    They only like Apples.

    75.) How long should a horse’s legs be?
    Long enough to reach the ground.

    76.) Why did the horse cross the road?
    Because somebody shouted “Hey!”

    More jokes for kids

    Hilarious horse jokes for kids

    Get ready to roll around on the floor laughing because these hilarious horse jokes for kids are coming your way. Suitable for the young and old, these horse jokes for kids will have you in stitches.

    77.) What does it mean if you find a horseshoe?
    Some poor horse is walking around in his socks.

    78.) What kind of horse is the fastest?
    A pregnant one, because it has 2 horsepower.

    79.) What did the waiter say to the horse?
    Can I get you a stable?

    80.) Why did the horse run away in the middle of its wedding?
    It got colt feet!

    81.) What do you call a pony with a sore throat?
    A little hoarse.

    82.) How did the other horse respond when the restaurant crew greeted him: “Hey”?
    That was what I was about to order!

    83.) What did the teacher say when the horse walked into her class?
    “Why the long face?”

    84.) What do you call a noisy horse?
    A herd animal.

    85.) What do you call an Amish guy with his hand in a horse’s mouth?
    A mechanic.

    Horse puns

    Are you looking for horse jokes for kids with puns? Our collection of funny jokes is sure to make your day. Here’s a collection of hilarious horse jokes for kids with puns that you and your family can enjoy.

    86.) What did one horse say to the other horse?
    Your pace (face) is familiar but I can’t remember your mane (name).

    87.) What do you call a horse that can’t lose a race?

    88.) Where do horses shop?
    Old Neigh-vy.

    89.) Where do horses go when they’re sick?
    The horse-pital.

    90.) Do you know why horse stalls at the racetrack are labeled A, B, D, E, and F?
    Because no one wants to bet on a seahorse (C-horse).

    91.) I was telling my barber about the time I found a small horse…
    But he cut off my pony tale!

    92.) Who is in charge of horse town?
    The mare (mayor).

    93.) What do horses say when their food gets stolen?
    Hay come back!

    94.) What did the Mother Horse say to the foal?
    It is pasture bedtime.

    95.) Why did the pony have to gargle?
    Because it was a little hoarse.

    Knock knock jokes

    Want to hear a knock-knock joke about horses for kids? Then you’ve come to the right place. Kids have a lot of fun with these jokes. AND parents laugh at them, too! Here are some knock-knock jokes about horses that can make a kid’s day brighter!

    96.) Knock Knock. – Who’s there?
    Horsp. – Horsp who?
    Did you just say “horse poo?”

    97.) Knock Knock. – Who’s there?
    Quiet horse. – Quiet horse, who?
    (In a whisper), “your neigh-bor…”

    98.) Knock knock. – Who’s there?
    Toledo. – Toledo who?
    Toledo horse to water is easy. To make him drink is not.

    Funny horse riddle

    99.) A woman rode her horse all the way up a hill on Friday. The next day she rode back on Friday, too. How is this possible?

    The horse is called Friday!

    Thanks for reading these funny horse jokes for kids. You’ll find more funny jokes for kids here:

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    By Greg Johnson | Published 10/24/2022