Bear Jokes For Kids
It’s no secret that kids love bears, like story-time favorites Winnie the Pooh, Yogi Bear, and Paddington Bear. And of course kids love to laugh, so why not bear jokes for kids?
We’ve assembled a list of the best bear jokes for children. They are kid-safe and family-friendly. Just relax, read on, and laugh out loud!
Best bear jokes for kids
Are you looking for bear humor that will tickle your funny bone? You’ve come to the right place because this section has some of the best!
1.) What is black, white, and green all over?
A panda during meal time.
2.) What kind of car does Yogi bear drive?
A Fur-rari.
3.) What do you call a bear with a bad attitude?
The bearer of bad news.
4.) What do you call a bear with no teeth?
A gummy bear.
5.) What did the teddy bear say to motivate his friend?
“Nothing is impawsible if you set your mind to it.”
6.) What has two black eyes but has never been punched?
Panda bear.
7.) Why did the bear get so scared?
Because there was a bear when he looked in the mirror.
8.) What color socks do bears wear?
None. They usually have bear feet.
9.) What did one koala bear say to the other?
“How’s it hanging?”
10.) What’s a koala’s favorite drink?
A root bear float.
11.) What do you call a freezing bear?
A brrrrrrr.
12.) What do you call bears without ears?
B’s.
Good bear jokes
These jokes will make you laugh, chuckle, giggle, and smile for days!
13.) What’s a polar bear’s favorite food?
Eskimo pies.
14.) What do polar bears like to eat in the cold?
A “brrr”-“grrr”!
15.) Do you know you only need two letters to spell panda?
You need a P and A.
16.) How did the grizzly bear walk in the snow?
Bear-footed.
17.) What do you call a confused panda?
Panboozled.
18.) What did the seal with the broken arm say to the polar bear?
Do not consume if the seal is broken.
19.) Why can’t grizzly bears change light bulbs?
They are all claws.
20.) Why do bears have a hairy coat?
Fur protection.
21.) Why did the bear dissolve in water?
Because it was polar.
22.) What do you call a bear that changes his mind every couple of minutes?
A bipolar bear.
23.) Did you hear about the grizzly who dyed her fur?
She was bearly recognizable.
24.) How do you apologize to a koala?
By bearing your heart and soul.
25.) What did the boy grizzly bear say to the girl grizzly bear on their wedding day?
“I can’t wait to growl old with you.”
26.) What do you get when you cross a bear with a garden?
Squash.
Short jokes
Kids will love this collection of short bear jokes. They are easy to say and simple to remember. Perfect for kids!
27.) What is as big as a bear but weighs nothing?
Its shadow.
28.) What time is it when a bear sits on your bed?
Time to get a new bed.
29.) What is a bear’s favorite drink?
A Koka-Koala.
30.) Why did the zookeeper talk to the koala?
He kept hanging around.
31.) Why do panda bears like going to flea markets?
They like to shop for the best beargains.
32.) Where do polar bears go to vote?
The North Poll.
33.) Why do pandas like old movies?
Because they’re in black and white.
34.) How can pandas get to a hospital quickly?
In a bamboolance.
35.) What is black, white, and smelly?
A gassy panda.
36.) Why did the polar bear go to the bank?
To seal the deal.
37.) What do you call a wet bear?
A drizzly bear.
Funny bear jokes for kids
These aren’t just a few funny bear jokes. They’re the funniest collection of bear jokes out there. Check them out!
38.) Why couldn’t the koala go out to eat?
He’s a picky eater.
39.) What do you call a grizzly bear in a phone booth?
Stuck.
40.) What do you call a bear who practices dentistry?
A molar bear.
41.) What do you call a gummy bear missing a leg?
Delicious.
42.) Why didn’t the baby bear leave his momma?
Because he couldn’t bear it.
43.) Why did the bear cross the road?
It was the chicken’s day off.
44.) What do you call a polar bear in Florida?
Solar bear.
45.) What did the teddy bear say when he was offered a second helping?
“No thanks, I’m already stuffed!”
46.) Why did the grizzly bear get sick?
He had a case of salmonella.
47.) Why did the koala cub forget his lunchbox at home?
He was bearly awake this morning and wasn’t thinking straight.
48.) What’s brown, furry and has twelve paws?
The Three Bears!
49.) What did one koala say to the waiter?
Leaf it right there!
Clean bear jokes for kids
How often have you told a joke to a child, and they laughed and wanted to hear another? Here’s a collection of clean jokes for kids that will keep them entertained for hours!
50.) What did the polar bear say to the seal on the bike?
“My meal has wheels.”
51.) What kind of hugs do polar bears give?
Bear hugs.
52.) What do you call a bear that jumps but never lands?
Peter Pan-da.
53.) What is a polar bear’s favorite shape?
ICE-osceles triangle.
54.) What does Pooh Bear call his significant other?
Hunny.
55.) What do you get if you cross a grizzly bear and a harp?
A bear faced lyre.
56.) What is a polar bear’s favorite cereal?
Ice Crispies.
57.) What bear goes around scaring other animals?
Winnie the Boo.
58.) Why did the two bears have to break up?
Because they were polar opposites.
59.) What did the polar bears call the sleeping campers?
Brrrr-itos.
60.) What did the panda pack in her suitcase?
The bear necessities.
Hilarious bear jokes
These jokes will leave the little ones laughing and smiling. Go ahead and give them a try!
61.) Why did the sloth get fired from his job?
He cannot even do the bear minimum.
62.) What is black and white and red all over?
A panda bear with a bad sunburn.
63.) Why do you never invite polar bears to parties?
Because they never break the ice.
64.) What do polar bears have for lunch?
An iceberger.
65.) What do grizzlies do when they are having a bad day in the forest?
Grin and bear it.
66.) What’s small and cuddly and bright purple?
A koala holding his breath.
67.) Where do teenage polar bears go dancing?
The snow-ball.
68.) Why do polar bears have fur coats?
Because they would look weird in ski jackets.
69.) Why did the bear quit his second job?
He needed some koalaty time with his family.
70.) Why did Mother Nature make only one Yogi Bear?
Because when he tried to make a second one he made a Boo-Boo.
71.) How does a bear stop a movie?
It hits the paws button.
Teddy bear jokes
This section is a compilation of the greatest teddy bear jokes you’ve ever read. Take your time, scroll through, and laugh out loud.
72.) What do you call a teddy bear who rides a bike everywhere?
Schwinnie the Pooh.
73.) What’s the difference between a teddy bear and an apple?
Teddy bears don’t grow on trees.
74.) How do you start a teddy bear race?
Ready, teddy, GO!
75.) What do you call a teddy bear at the North Pole?
Lost.
76.) What do you get when you cross a teddy bear with a pig?
A teddy boar.
77.) What is the teddy bear’s favorite food?
Stuffing.
78.) What kind of umbrella does a teddy bear carry when it’s raining?
A wet one.
79.) What do turkeys and teddy bears have in common?
They both have stuffing.
80.) How do teddies send their letters?
By bear mail, of course.
81.) People often ask what I do at the teddy bear factory. My reply?
“Just stuff.”
Check out these animal puns for kids.
Silly bear jokes for kids
Who doesn’t like a good bear joke? I mean, they are definitely hilarious! And parents and teachers will love sharing these clean jokes with children of all ages.
82.) What do grizzlies do when they are having a bad day in the forest?
Grin and bear it.
83.) Which animal can hibernate while standing on its head?
Yoga Bear.
84.) Why is polar bear cheap to have as a pet?
It lives on ice.
85.) What’s black and white, black and white, and black and white?
A panda bear rolling down a hill.
86.) Why don’t bears like fast food?
Because they can’t catch it.
87.) What do you call a big white bear with a hole in his middle?
A polo bear.
88.) What is a polar bear’s favorite healthy snack?
Iceberg lettuce and snow peas.
89.) Why shouldn’t you take a bear to the zoo?
Because they’d rather go to the movies.
90.) Why can’t the polar bears watch TV?
They pawsed it.
91.) What did the polar bear say when she slipped and fell on the ice?
“How embearassing!”
92.) What do Alexander the Great and Winnie the Pooh have in common?
They both have ‘the’ as their middle names.
93.) What did the polar bear eat after the dentist fixed its tooth?
The dentist.
Bear puns
Puns are a favorite of dads everywhere for telling dad jokes. We’ve assembled some of the best bear jokes dads (and anyone!) can share with children.
94.) Which is the scariest fairy tale?
Ghouldilocks and the Three Brrrrs.
95.) Which poet do koala bears love?
Shakesbear.
96.) What do you call a koala bear with a red hat?
Santa Claws.
97.) What do you get if you cross a skunk with a bear?
Winnie the P.U.!
98.) Why did the bear quit his job at the daycare center?
It was a panda-monium.
99.) What does pooh eat at parties?
A blue bear-y pie.
100.) Why was the koala sad?
They said he wasn’t koalafied for the job.
101.) What types of drawings are panda bears really good at drawing?
Self pawtraits.
102.) How do bears travel when they go on vacation?
They ride on bear-o-planes.
103.) How do bears keep cool?
They use bear-conditioning.
104.) How does the koala bear stay fit?
He does bearobics.
105.) How do you catch a fish without a fishing rod?
With your bear hands.
Knock knock jokes
Bear knock knock jokes frequently include witty puns that can make your day. They are timeless and will always be relatable. Look:
106.) Knock knock. – Who’s there?
Bear. – Bear who?
Bear with me, I’m trying to get a joke out of my head.
107.) Knock knock. – Who’s there?
Bear. – Bear who?
There’s a bear on my porch, let me in!
108.) Knock, knock. – Who’s there?
Bear. – Bear who?
Bear with me. It’s so cold that I can hardly speak.
109.) Knock, knock. – Who’s there?
A bear. – A bear who?
(Runs away) A bear in a hurry.
If you enjoyed reading these funny bear jokes, here are more kids jokes to entertain the whole family:
By Greg Johnson | Published 11/8/2022
